Sunday, Sunday

So yesterday was a rough one. Sunday is usually a day I look forward to all week, namely because it is a day that involves two great things: church and relaxing. But yesterday. It hit me.

Upon moving to Tulsa, I had originally planned on returning to Stillwater on a weekly basis to continue attending church at Countryside, a place that definitely has my heart as far as churches go. Countryside is a place is where the Word of God is taught without reservation and where people love without hesitation. There is a lot of sentimental value for me with that church, specifically because it is the first place that I truly grew as a believer and learned what it really means to be a disciple, to love and thrive on the study of Scripture, and to serve out of love instead of fear. I believe that I will always love Countryside. It represents a time for me when the Lord did miraculous things in my life. I hope to someday be able to call it home again.

Back to yesterday. I decided that in the best interest of my emotional stability and adjusting to living in Tulsa, it probably wasn’t the best idea to go to Stillwater every week. So, last week, I visited for the first time at a church here in Tulsa. It is a church that JB (pastor at Countryside) recommended and where a good friend from Tulsa has attended for some time. It is a place that uses expository teaching to proclaim the grace message of salvation, is mission oriented, and is known for having good fellowship. Sounds like a great fit! So last week I liked it alright, but I wasn’t sold. This week, it honestly seemed worse. The Sunday school I attended was awkward and shallow and the teaching and worship both left a lot to be desired. Disclaimer: I am not by any means trying to bash this church…just because it might not work for me doesn’t mean that it isn’t good or isn’t doing great things.

As I sat in that service, I had the hardest time trying to not compare it to Countryside, which I realize just isn’t fair. I know that I have to accept that no church will be Countryside, unless I just go there, which isn’t going to work. I guess the point is just that I am having a hard time. I know there are other churches to try and it will get better being here, but it is just hard, when I had feel like I had just begun to get settled in and loving the body in Stillwater. I miss it so much my heart literally aches. Many times I want nothing more than to be back in Stillwater, at Countryside and with the people I love so dearly, but I must remind myself that the Lord is sovereign and has a reason for this time.

He is the prize.
Regardless of where I am.
Or who I am with.
Or what church I go to.
Or how I feel.
He is the ultimate reason and reward.