The Lessons I Learned

One year in Tulsa. Many lessons learned.

1. All children in this nation truly do not receive an equal education.
2. I am not meant to work in the inner city (at least at this point in my life).
3. Parenting classes should be required.
4. The education system in America is more broken than the vast majority of citizens know.
5. I continue to need to practice patience.
6. Children are exposed to too much, too soon.
7. Racism is still very much alive (and sometimes in reverse).
8. The welfare system is incredibly and sickeningly taken advantage of.
9. People are crazy.
10. Traffic is stupid.
11. Adults often yell at other adults.
12. Teachers are underestimated, undervalued, and underpaid.
13. People who are not in education think they can fix it.
14. Relationships are really hard.
15. Family is extremely important.
16. I'm not as strong as I thought I was.
17. I have a lot to learn about walking in the Spirit.
18. Kids literally forget all rules the last few weeks of school.
19. We live in a fallen, selfish, prideful, ugly world.
20. I am no exception to the above statement.

The list could go on, but I'll stop there for now. There will surely be more posts regarding some of these or other topics as I seek to process my experiences over the past year. I has been hard, good, bad, enlightening, and all together insane. I don't know where I stand right now, but I'm seeking normalcy.

Silly Kids

I know I seem to complain a lot about my kids, but some days (luckily) they are just funny. Today was chaotic, but I want to share some funny things I heard IN ONE DAY:

1. "Ms. Andree, you didn't brush your hair."
2. "Ms. Andree, your hair looks pretty."
3. "Teacher, Iysis said she's sexy."
4. "Well, that's awkward. What does awkward even mean?"
5. "But teacher, my head really hurts. My pants are too big, I need a belt, can I go get a belt?"

Gotta love em.

Clarity and Confusion

It is interesting.
Isn't it?
When you find out the truth.
That you wish you didn't.
When everything is clear.
But then you are so confused.
And you wish the question remained.
But then you'd be too naive.
So you've figured it out.
And now there's pain.
A sickening feeling.
Yet you find relief.
Because the wondering is gone.
Has it always been obvious?
And you only ignored it?
Or did something change?
And is it your fault?
Or was it meant to be?
And it only took time?
Life could be easy.
But how would you grow?
God has a plan.
That's all that you know.

I Feel

disappointed
taken advantage of
under-appreciated
unwanted
helpless
unnoticed
unloved
out of place
uncomfortable
unimportant
incompetent
incomplete
left behind
hurt
unworthy
angry
irritated
unsure
forgotten
YET
loved
cared for
important
wanted
noticeable
purposeful
unique
special

feelings are a blessing and a curse.

23rd birthday!

I seriously feel so blessed. The day started off with early phone calls from my parents. Christa and Kristin had sweet homemade cards for me as well as a new OSU mug! (Thanks Christa!) The first child I saw when I walked into school was totally one of my favorites (I know, I'm terrible), and she said in the most precious voice, "Good morning! Happy Birthday Ms. Andree!" SO adorable. Throughout the day, there were more phone calls and of course many facebook posts. Several text messages and a heytell message that melted my heart (you know who you are, and thank you :). Of course, I got the usual opera happy birthday song from Mamalu, which after 23 years, is still something I look forward to! And to jump ahead a little, I got to spend Saturday in Oklahoma City with my mom doing some shopping, talking, and getting a fantastic dinner at Cheesecake Factory!

As soon as school was over on Friday, I headed home to get packed up and head to Stillwater for a birthday evening planned by others. I knew that we were doing something for my birthday, but nobody would tell me exactly what. I only knew who would be there- Beth, Tommie Lee, Christa, Kristin, Amy, Dani, and myself. When we got to Stillwater, we went straight to Beth's, where I found out we were having a progressive dinner. The appetizers at Beth's were superb! I opened a gift (a great cardigan/sweater from Beth!) and we ate and talked before heading to Tommie Lee's for the entree. TL had prepared a delicious dinner for all of us, I opened another gift (a beautiful scarf from TL!) and we played a 20 questions game. Everyone had to answer questions about me and it was so hilarious to hear their answers! After dinner, we headed to Zannottis for desert and drinks. Such a fantastic night :)

So, let's get down to it...why am I raving about this evening and even taking the time to write about it? Well, it really is simple. It was the PERFECT party for me. I am a quality time type person. I love small groups of close friends and one-on-one time. My friends know that. I also notice details and delight in the little things in life. Examples: Beth had made little party favor bags for everyone to take. She planned the game and had the papers printed out on purple paper (my favorite). TL had the table set up and decorated so beautifully. There were even little name cards at our seats. The food was Italian (I love Italian food). So thoughtful, so precious. I felt like they planned it with me in mind, and as dumb as it may sound, it really made me feel special. Everyone there was such a delight! To have those women all together for a night- especially to celebrate my birthday- blesses my heart to an extent words cannot convey.

Needless to say, I have the best friends in the world.

To my dear friends, you are all amazing. I am so thankful for each of you and the friendship we share. Thank you for the most meaningful birthday I've ever had; it couldn't have been better. Thank you for loving me. I love you all immensely.

snow day!!

Sooo, it snowed. Not enough for it to really be a big deal, but we got out of school for a day nonetheless. The day was fantastic, and included the following delights:

1) reading a book
2) crafting
3) Chilis for lunch
4) sledding down a hill on a pizza pan
5) pushing Elizabeth's car up a hill
6) taking a running leap into a speeding car
7) playing at a park
8) snow football
9) dinner at Tia's
10) NOT going to work

win. win. win. Thank you weather!!! :)

when all is NOT right with the world

I have really been challenged lately. Like REALLY challenged. I feel like there is so much going on in my life that I have absolutely no control over. So many things happening that I cant change. So many things to learn from. So much opportunity for trust. I know that I don’t need to have control, and really, it isn’t that part that I am struggling with. It is more that my heart is just so overwhelmed by all that is going on around me.

My tendency when life throws me curve balls, is to go straight to friends…to vent, to cry, to ask for prayer. But lately in conversation, it has occurred to me that this is not always the best approach. Yes. I understand that asking for prayer within the body of Christ and being there for one another are great things. But all too often I find myself running straight there instead of straight to the Lord. So I’m trying this thing… where I don’t run to tell someone when something is wrong. As I write today, I realize that none of you knows what I am speaking of. And that is okay for now. I believe that Christ is sufficient. I believe He is more than I need. I believe He can heal me and comfort me more than any human ever could. I believe those things, so now it is time that I live like it. I have to let Him be my everything.

That being said, I don’t want to write what is currently going on. But I can say that I am once again learning to trust. I do want to leave you with the lyrics of a song that is my cry right now…it speaks simple truth that moves me.

Healer by Hillsong…

You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease

I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my Portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands

Prayer

So I've been thinking a lot lately about prayer. Sometimes it really is all we have. And it's about trust. I feel like I am constantly learning how to trust the Lord in my personal life with specific situations that arise. But I'm seeing now that prayer is also about learning to trust God with others.

I am the type of person who loves largely by doing things for others. I love getting to serve and help out. When someone I love has a lot on their plate, I want to make life a little easier. It is something that I say not to pat myself of the back, but because it is something that I have struggled with lately. In moving to Tulsa, I have had to realize that I am not always going to be around those people that I am used to helping. Now, there is always service. There is always an opportunity to show the love of Christ to those around us. I am talking more about love in personal relationships. I am a fixer in many ways. When people dear to me are going through struggles, I always want to fix them, and I usually end up just helping in any way that I can. I delight in doing it. However, now, that is something that in many circumstances, I just cannot do.

Writing about it seems almost silly, but I think that the Lord is really showing me that although my heart desires to be with people that I love and be able to help, that sometimes I really can't be the fixer. I need to realize that God is bigger than me or the little things that I can do to temporarily help others. Yes, it is a way that I love, and I still think it's ok, but I also know that I can't do it all. I have to trust God to take care of loved ones. They are His children. And from the distance, all I really can do is pray. That He would work in their lives. That He would reveal Himself to them. That He would protect them. So I'm clinging to it. Praying... because it really is all I can do.

Pray.
Constantly.
Relentlessly.

2010: the year in review

• Nala turned 1 year old
• I turned 22
• Student taught in 1^st grade in Morrison
• spent spring break with some of my faves
• Met a precious new friend, Beth
• took fun senior pics
• Loved every second of Crossover events
• finished JB’s 2:2 study
• Graduated from college
• Went to the lake a couple times
• went to some fun weddings
• Spent 5 weeks in Phoenix, AZ for training

• Moved to Tulsa, OK with Christa
• Started my first teaching job
• Went to the Tulsa State Fair
• Took a lot of trips to Stillwater
• Threw an amazing party for TL’s 40th
• Watched some great Cowboy football- go pokes!
• Ran the relay in the Route 66 marathon
• Took a road trip to Vici, OK
• Finished my first semester of teaching kindergarten
• Sang again in the Countryside Christmas Musical
• Went skiing with the Lester’s in Breckenridge, CO
• Spent Christmas in WF with the family

It has really been a whirlwind of a year. So much happened. But, if I were to sum it up, I would have to say that most of all, it was a year of growth. I grew tremendously in my walk with the Lord through studies at Countryside and because of personal trials that came along. I had to "grow up" and become an adult with this whole graduating and getting a job thing. A couple relationships grew and changed in ways that still amaze and bless me to this day. So maybe that is what life is all about. Changing and growing and learning. I totally love it. I can look back on this year and know that I am not where I was. I am not who I was. God has some kind of greater purpose. I am so thankful that He loves me too much to let me remain the same, even for a year. Even when that means change, or pain. Praise You, Lord, for growth. You amaze me.

Ski trip 2010: epic success

This year we went to Breckenridge, and it was absolutely wonderful! There was a very different group from last year…very few of us. But, I totally loved it just as much! Following are reasons:

1. I I love skiing.

2 I I love Colorado.

3. I I love road trips.

4. I I dearly love the people I went with.

Sounds like a winner to me. After a long semester of transition, this trip was much needed, and although I was so tired after it, I was also rejuvenated. I don’t think I would really ever want to live in the mountains, just because to me it is such a vacation thing. I love that when I go to that part of the country, I can just sit and marvel at the beauty. I enjoy being able to fall in love with it and with our Lord every time. I am repeatedly amazed at how beautiful God made the mountains. I am also encouraged by how beautiful He made people, inside and out. Although we are all fallen people, God really made every person amazing in some way. For that reason, I cherish quality time and getting to see those glimpses of His character in my relationships with others.

Here are some pics to recap:

Tommie Lee and I have skied together the last two years and have a great time together!

Halle is such a precious blessing in my life! I am SO proud of her and Jevyn for dominating on their snowboards this year!!

Just a glimpse of the beauty that surrounded us!

JJ and I :)

One semester down

Well, I have finished teaching my first semester of kindergarten, and I have so many thoughts and feelings about it that I struggle to decide where to begin. It has been a whirlwind for sure. The last day of school before Christmas break was a long anticipated day, yet when it finally came and went, I literally drove away from my school with an uneasy feeling. Much thought to follow in the hour in the car I had ahead of me. I headed toward Stillwater where I would spend the evening with good friends and then get in a van to head to Colorado to go skiing. That is where I find myself today, sitting in a lovely condo in the mountains in beautiful Breckenridge, CO. I sit in front of the fire with tired legs after a day full of skiing, taking in the greatness of all that our God has created and loving watching how people are enjoying it. Whether they know it or not, they are a part of something huge...we all are. And in that, I see so much.

Am I making a difference in lives of my students? Do they know how much I love them? Have I taught them enough? Will they be ready for 1st grade in only a few more months? As I left school on Friday for our two week break, I felt uneasy. I have all these questions running through my mind. And honestly, I think I know the answer to the questions. We did what we needed to do. No, it was absolutely not perfect, but they learned, and I surely did. We made progress, but I think that I just felt funny about it because it was just not everything that I had ever hoped and dreamed. I am definitely relieved that one semester is done. There will certainly never be another like it. And in short, I'd say I am pleased.

Some lessons learned: be strict from day one, be consistent, have explicit expectations, procedures procedures procedures, plan plan plan, differentiate, movement, small groups.

So there it is. One semester down. Tired. Needing rest. Reflective. And in it all, I think about how God is working things out. He has this huge plan that is so much grander than anything I can think of. It's a truth that I must cling to. When the days are hard, I know I have to hold to the promise that God is always with me, working it out for good. There is purpose. My life is His. Whether I love where I am or not, I have to live as a servant of the Almighty King. And what better time of year than now to remember about living a life of surrender to the One who became flesh that He might save us. God found Mary faithful and used her to bring about the most amazing plan of all. May He also find me faithful, and find me fit to use even more to further His love in this world.

Let us all surrender our lives to the One who knows best, the One who will make something out of what we see as nothing, the One who turns hardship into victory, and the One who created the majestic mountains to let us see Him. Praise You, Lord, for You alone are worthy.

Pray, Wait, Trust

Well, it's been a while since I last wrote. Here is a quick update of my life:
- went to Wichita Falls and spent some time with loved ones
- went to Bedlam, the Cowboys lost :(
- still loving going to Countryside
- got cursed out by a student's parent
- said parent threatened to sue me for child neglect
- preparing for the Countryside Christmas musical!
- went to a precious Ladies Christmas Brunch
- took roadtrip to Vici, OK
- played racquetball for the first time in long time!
- hurt my back :(
- gearing up for the ski trip to Breckenridge!
- only 8 days of school left!!!

In the midst of it all, there have been some really hard days at school as well as in my personal life. I feel as though the Lord is really trying to teach me to wait and trust Him. There are things that I absolutely do not understand...things I wish were different...or easier. I find myself desiring things that aren't happening as quickly as I hoped, or maybe not at all. I don't understand why a lot happens just the way it does. I find myself questioning...looking for purpose in the current struggle. And you know, a verse that I think is often easily overlooked as cliche comes to mind with resounding clarity...Proverbs 3:5 says "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding."

So I am to trust, even when I don't understand why life happens the way it does. Not worrying, but trusting that God has a purpose. There is some reason. As we enter the Christmas season, I can't help but think about how confused Mary must have been at becoming pregnant as a virgin. How desperately she wanted answers...how she may have wanted her circumstance to be different. Yet she had to trust the Lord, not relying on what she understood of the situation. In the same way, I have to wait on the Lord's plan and trust. I have to live like I know that He is working all things out to accomplish His ultimate purpose.

Lord, during this season, may we really learn to trust You and You alone. Even though we may not understand the way life goes, let us live relying on the fact that You are Lord over all. May Christmas remind us that you have a plan that is beyond us. As we pray, teach us to wait on your answer, no matter what it may be. God, You are bigger and stronger than any of our struggles. Make Yourself known. Amen.

Thankful, part 2

Since part 1 was about specific people I am thankful for, I want to spend time reflecting on some other things in life that I am particularly taken by. Isn't it the little things that make the day-to-day something more marvelous?

- seasons: Fall is for sure my favorite. Yet when it is almost time for a season to change, I get so excited for the next one and seem to love it just as much as the previous one. I love that God made seasons for us.
- my church: I would not be where I am without my precious church. Love that body. I cherish the time I spend there and hope for it to never end!
- music: what a wonder! I seriously have music on ALL the time. I totally love it.
- my job: even though I complain about it, I really am thankful that I have a job, a chance to make a difference. I pray each day that I change at least 1 child's life.
- ice cream: I love it. It had to be on the list.
- Nala: she always loves me, and I love her back. I just adore my sweet little puppy and the entertainment she provides.
- quality conversations: I totally love talking to people and getting to know them better. Whether it is someone I have known forever or someone new, I love real conversation.
- emotions: a blessing and a curse. And yes, I am thankful for them. :)
- Oklahoma State/Stillwater: someone recently asked me why I chose to attend OSU, and my answer is still, "I don't know, God made me." It is simply where I was supposed to be. I believe that with all that I am. I love it. I always will.
- hugs: I just love that getting a hug from the right person makes you feel so great. I'm thankful for hugs!
-sports: they are entertainment. They are fun to participate in. They are good exercise. Thank God for sports!
-laughter: so good for the soul. that's all.
-relationship: we were made for it. I am thankful that, although relationships can definitely be trying, they can be such a beautiful thing.

God has given us SO MANY little things.

Thank you Lord for caring about us. As if You aren't enough, you give me the little things to delight in. You are so precious. Your love is so evident. Help me to see you every day in those things. You are the creator of all. You are beyond words and I love you.

Thankful, part 1

Well, with Thanksgiving approaching this week, I figured I'd write a "thankful" post or two. There are so many things to be thankful for... God has given me more than I deserve for sure. And even though life is rough in some ways right now, I know that God is working all things out for good. I'll spend this post sharing why I am thankful for specific people in my life (in no particular order :)

- Christa- what would I do if we weren't roommates? I'm thankful that I can come home to someone who will listen, laugh, cry, craft, rant, or eat Chilis with me. You make me funnier, and I love that. Thanks for being you.
- Beth- You have been more than a great friend. I love that we can talk about anything and fear no rejection. You have encouraged me and questioned me in ways that others did not. I love that we help each other grow in our walks with the Lord. I am so thankful for your sweet heart.
- Tommie Lee and JJ- where would I be without my precious Stillwater family? You guys have loved me and supported me. You have taught me more than you know. I love that you guys really show you care when you listen. I love that you make me feel like I matter. I love your children. I love being a part of your family. I am so thankful that you are in my life.
- Mom- I owe you so much. Literally. I am so thankful that we are friends. I love that you still answer the questions that I shouldn't still have to ask. I love that you always call me back. I love that you trust me, and I you. I love that you are right there any time I need you. Thanks for everything you do, I wish I told you more how much I appreciate you.
- Kristin- Where to even begin? For years we have been friends, and I love it. You add that extra little spice to my life that makes me a little less serious. I am so thankful that we can always have candid conversations. Thanks for being who you are in my life.
- Tammy- you are so precious. I love that when we get to see each other, it's as if we were never apart. I love that you never skirt around the truth. I love that your family treats me as their own. You have been such a huge part of my life for so many years and I will always be thankful for your friendship.
-Mamalu- you hold this special place in my heart that will never be replaced. I don't see you much, but when I do, it is undoubtedly always memorable. I love the woman that you are. Thank you for teaching and loving me. I am so thankful for you.

Of course, I am thankful for all the dear ones in my life as I know that the Lord has had our paths cross for a specific purpose. More thankfulness to come.... :)

For the Good

So I absolutely love this song by Shane and Shane. I feel like in many ways, it portrays where I am right now. Waiting, struggling...but praise be to the Lord, for He is working all things out. --- Romans 8:28

When darkness is surrounding me
by Your Spirit, Lord help me sing
that You are working all things out
Lord, I really need to hear you speak
Remind me in the waiting
that You are working all things out


For the good of those
who are called by You
for the good of those
who are in Love with You
That's why we sing


Holy God of light
I lay down my life
Holy is the Lord
Even in the storm be glorified


We like to take the blessing from You
Shall we not take the trouble too
You are working all things out
We like to take prosperity
Shall we not take the suffering
You are working all things out


Holy are you Lord
even in the storm
be glorified
Worthy of affection

Patience

Such a huge struggle. Spiritually and relationally hard.

Over the past week, I've been thinking a lot about patience, for several different reasons. As I was just catching up on some blogs, I came across a friend's post about patience. She had some great things to say, and honestly it was challenging to me. It reinforced some of the things I have been thinking about over the past week and was at the same time comforting to know I'm not the only one. What is it about never wanting to stand alone in a struggle?? I guess it has to do with something JB said in church this morning...how we were meant for relationship. We need each other to go through this life, to teach and learn from each other. Although my struggle differs slightly from this precious friend, some things she mentioned struck cords with me and urged me to go ahead and write. You can go here: http://exceedinglyabundantlyabove.blogspot.com/2010/11/patience.html to read her post. Thanks Beth :)

Oh, where to start on this grand topic? Well, my job. I'll start there. IT IS HARD. I do not plan to spend another entire post boring you with the grungy details of the daily life of a kindergarten teacher in the ghetto. My aim here is reveal my weakness. As this year has progressed, I have expected that these children would get a clue. Of how I expect them to behave. Of how humans behave. But, alas, they have not. My parents came for a quick classroom visit last week and were appalled by the behavior in my school. All of this to say, I have become SO impatient with these kids. There are days when I choose to let it all roll off my shoulders and laugh at them. But most days, I am entirely frustrated. I don't know what to do with this kind of defiance and outright disobedience. I find myself often becoming angry and short-tempered. May I please say- that is absolutely NOT the person or teacher I want to be. Colossians 3:12 resounds in my mind, and I think, "Wow, I'm totally failing at this when it comes to these kids." Paul writes, "So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." Dear Lord, help me get a hold on just a pinch of this. I want to be understanding and love them. I want to teach them and make a difference, but I don't think I am doing any such thing.

Ok, now for the more personal side of patience that I am trying to figure out in this current season. I find myself often thinking that things that I want should be happening quicker in my life. In our culture, we see immediate gratification all over the place. Nobody waits for anything anymore. You want it, you get it. I see that being true materially as well as in relationships. Where I struggle is in thinking that if I were just in (--insert particular place--) or if God would just grant me (--insert particular desire--) then things would be so much better. But really, who am I to play the "if" game with God? I should be waiting on Him to bring about those things in HIS perfect timing, not mine. Why am I being so impatient with the things I want in this life? Is not the whole purpose of this life to honor the Lord and bring glory to His name? When did I become so self-consumed?

Wow. God is really doing something in this heart of mine. To love Him more and desire His fame more than my own wants. How do I let go of the things I want, WAIT on Him to bring about the things I actually need, and serve faithfully all the while? How do I let go without complaining? Without clinging? Without fear? Well, it's faith. I have to grab hold of the truths of God's promises. I have to.

HE WILL BE NO DISAPPOINTMENT. That I am convinced of.

Expectations

I feel like a huge theme of my life for the past little while has been expectations. In moving to Tulsa, and in going back to Stillwater often as I do, I realized pretty quickly that my expectations of other people needed some adjustment. This is definitely something I have grappled with before...trying to figure out how to just let things be and go with the flow...not take things personally and just truly cherish time that I get to spend with people. It has been a learning curve for sure, and honestly, something the Lord has grown me in tremendously. There are some relationships that God has blessed and have grown, and I am so thankful that is the case! Yet, I find that in some ways, I am still learning and today I realized new aspects about expectations that I hadn't pieced together before.

This morning at church, as we were finishing up the study on 2 Timothy, we read in chapter 4, verses 16 and 17, "At my first defense no one supported me, but all deserted me; may it not be counted against them. But the Lord stood with me and strengthened me, so that through me the proclamation might be fully accomplished, and that all the Gentiles might hear; and I was rescued out of the lion's mouth." Paul is speaking of how when he was proclaiming the Gospel, others were not backing him up as they should have, yet he forgave them, knowing that humans fail, God forgives (as should we), and that God was there.

JB talked about how as humans, we will absolutely fail. Others will fail us and will fail them. Expectations are all too often set and not met. And in my knowing this and learning to grow through it, one part that I have missed is embracing that the Lord IS the only constant one...it's not just me there all alone. God is there standing with me, making me stronger all the while. Not that I have been deserted as Paul speaks of, but been failed or disappointed by someone? Definitely. Disappointed others? Absolutely. It is inevitable. Likely if you are reading this, I have disappointed you or you have me. It really is the way we work. But I think that I am in this place now where I am learning to not have crazy expectations, yet even when they are realistic, to not be upset when I'm let down. Cling to the Lord. Ultimately His purpose will be accomplished, just as it was in Paul's day.

Another piece I thought about as the day went on and as I visited with a friend, was the thought that I also have expectations of God. Like in my mind, I am trying to figure out the way something should work out and expecting God to have things play out the way I dream it up. Putting that in writing sounds like total craziness, and really, it is. I am not in charge of this place we call earth. For crying out loud, I am really not even in charge of my own life. God is. Who am I to expect that God would have things go MY way. This is something that I totally didn't even recognize in myself until today, as I was thinking on specific situation that I clearly have my own opinion on. Praise the Lord for revealing this shortcoming in my thoughts, so that once again I can see that He really is in control and my trust for the present and future has to be solely in Him.

So that's it for now. Learning more every day. Loving Him more every day.

Nothing to say...

So I just came to this realization. I have nothing to say. Allow me to explain. There are people in my life whom I love dearly that I do not get to see on a regular basis. People that I consider hugely special and important that I don't talk to very often. So tonight, I was thinking about how I would like to call and visit, but then the realization hit: I have nothing to say.

What's new?: nothing, I go to work, come home, run, eat, relax, sleep, and do it all again.

How is teaching?: still really hard, but we (the kids and I) are slowly and surely figuring it out

Found a church?: no, still going to Stillwater for church most weekends

Found a guy?: no, still waiting on the Lord to bring him around

It is a sad story I know, I just don't know what else to say. I feel like my life has become this boring routine that has left me completely uninteresting. I would like for this to be different. Maybe I can find some new ways to spice it up. This is a new time, a transition time for sure. So maybe I should just enjoy being able to relax and figure it out.

One thing I know for sure: Christ is the prize. Regardless of how challenging, lonely, or confusing this life can be. He is the great reward and I need to focus my efforts on serving Him through the journey.

To those of you whom I may not be keeping in touch with as much as normal, bear with me through this time. I'm learning and I'm trying to figure it out. Your prayers mean the world to me and I love you dearly.

Weekend of my life!

So this weekend was THE BEST! It was fall break, which means a 5 day weekend!! I went to Stillwater to celebrate America's Greatest Homecoming Celebration as well as Tommie Lee's birthday! We have been planning this surprise party for Tommie Lee's 40th for a couple months and it was SO FUN!! On top of that, I got to spend 5 days in a place I love with many people I love!

Highlights of the weekend:
- popping into Crossover on Wednesday night
- having lunch with the Lesters and then with Beth on Thursday
- shopping with Christa, Kristin and Dani
- lazy movie night at the house
- lunch with friends from the college ministry Friday
- party planning final touches on Friday
- dancing the night away at TOMMIE LEE's surprise party!!!!
- visiting with TL Saturday morning
- going to the football game with friends!
- seeing Heather at the game!
- watching the 2nd half with the Lesters
- COUNTRYSIDE Sunday morning
- walking Boomer with Beth
- early morning walk with Kristin

Oh, the Lord is so good to me. This weekend absolutely exceeded my expectations in every way. I loved so many things. I feel blessed to have wonderful people in my life whom I love deeply. Seeing them and spending time brings a smile to my face like nothing else. Thank you Lord for the blessing that relationship can be.


Beth and I at the party!


the beautiful birthday girl and I!!


friends at the game!

Poopyhead

Yes, that's right.

This week has been one full of...well, you fill in the blank. Let me break it down.

1. student poops in my floor- smashes it into the carpet.
2. said student gets called "poopyhead." I try not to laugh.
3. 3 days of prep for observations.
4. 2 observations in 1 day.
5. student pretends to speak in spanish. Gibberish. I laugh.
6. I lose the election for secretary of PTA.
7. student A teaches student B to give others the middle finger.
8. student B's mother = angry. Rightfully so.
9. no sub = extra students in my class.
10. 5 year old's cursing. and fighting.

In the words of my dear friend Christa, "Can I quit yet?"

Need I say more?